Monday morning joke!

Stairways to Heaven:

There is a blonde, a redhead and a brunette on the stairway to heaven.God says, "There are 3,000 steps and i'll tell you a joke on each 1,000th step you reach. If you laugh you go to hell." So they start walking and reach to the first 1,000th step. God tells a joke, the brunette laughs and goes to hell.Then on the 2,000th step God tells a joke, the redhead laughs and goes to hell.On the 3,000th step God tells a joke, the blonde doesn't laugh and proceeds to the gate. Suddenly, she bursts out laughing. God asks, "what are you laughing about?", so she replies, "i just got the first joke!".

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Special Ring:

An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young gal at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend. The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring and showed it to him. The old man said, "I don't think you understand, I want something very special." At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over. "Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000," the jeweler said. The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this said, "We'll take it." The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old man stated, by check. " I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon," he said. Monday morning, a very teed-off jeweler phoned the old man. "There's no money in that account." "I know", said the old man, "but can you imagine the weekend I had?".